I saw THE CONJURING over the weekend and I'm glad to say I'll be having traumatic flashbacks for sometime—my washer and dryer are in the dark spooky part of the basement.
Seriously, the freaky doll in the very beginning was enough to make me avoid Toys R Us for a long, long time.
However, I'm not worried if my house does become infested with demonic souls from hell, I'll have plenty of time to pack my bags and head for the Vatican because THE CONJURING not only entertained me to the brink of incontinence, but it also taught me some very valuable tips on surviving a haunted house.
Top five survival tips I learned from THE CONJURING:
#1. If the family dog refuses to enter the house...move out.
#2. If you bought the huge farm house at a bank auction dirt cheep because none of the locals would bid...move out.
#3. If you discover a boarded up entrance to a secret basement...move out.
#4. If the youngest sibling starts talking to an imaginary friend who knows all kinds of hiding places in the house...move out.
#5. If invisible hands push you down stairs, break all your picture frames, and leave unexplained bruises on you at night...move out.
BONUS! If the creepy old furniture starts moving around on its own...move out.
What have scary movies taught you?